Amazing Grace



*A note before you read this. After doing an audit of my blog in 2022, I have decided to leave content that speaks to the Christian I was at the time this was written. I no longer identify as Christian (and haven’t for a very long time.) I chose to leave these posts because it is who I was then and it is important to me to be honest and true with every iteration and evolution of self that I experience. I may decide to add comments to the end of posts like this as well


In September of 2008, God allowed me to sing my grandma into eternity. She was a strong woman and fought to the very end, but went peacefully. A gift such as this would come along only once in a lifetime.

Not so much.

In the wee hours of Monday June 7, 2010, I was getting ready to sleep for a couple hours in the adjoining bed in mom’s hospital room. In these final days, we all knew her time was short, but only God knew the minute and hour he’d call her home. The nurse came in to take mom’s vitals. Asked me if I needed anything. I brushed my teeth. I leaned over mom and talked to her. Told her I was going to nap in the bed next to her, I wasn’t leaving the room, I’d be right there.

In that moment, her respirations dropped in half. I got closer, kissed her forehead, caressed her cheek, told her I love her. I said, “Ok mom. I’m not going to sleep. I’m just going to stay right here with you, ok?” And I did. More talking. More kissing. More breathing in her scent.

Without even knowing what was happening, I said, “Mom? I don’t know if you want me to sing to you like I did grandma, but I sure will.”

Amazing Grace
How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me

Mom’s mouth moved for the first time in days, as if she was singing with me. I started over because I couldn’t remember any other words.

Amazing Grace
How sweet the sound

And she breathed her last.

Twice in a lifetime I sang the two most important women in my life into eternity. There is no such thing as coincidence.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket


This post originally published at Zane’s Milk Machine.

17 thoughts on “Amazing Grace”

  1. That is a beautiful story, Michelle. I'm getting teary-eyed. What an amazing memory. Think of the joyful singing the three of you will be doing together someday :).

  2. Oh Michelle, this makes me appreciate my mom even more right now, that I still have her here on earth with me. How precious that you were able to spend her last minutes on earth by her side singing to her as God took her hand and ushered up to heaven. Such a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing this tender moment with us. Love and prayers to you!

  3. So sorry for your loss. If I were talking, not typing, I would not be able to speak through the tears. Tears for your loss, and tears for your joy to have that special memory.

  4. My son is looking at me with such concern as I sit here crying, unable to explain to him why for the moment.
    I'm so sorry for your pain.
    I'm so thankful for this gift God gave you and her.
    God bless you, my friend.

  5. Oh Michelle you have me in tears. I am so sorry for your huge losses but wow there is no denying that grace is amazing.


  6. michelle–this is so amazing. what beautifully tender, precious moments.
    what a beautiful reunion i'm sure they're having.

  7. I know that she was so thankful to have you there with her, sorry that you had to do it but grateful that you did it with such love. the lump in my throat is overwhelming for you…so sorry she is gone.

  8. Oh Michelle… sweet, sweet Michelle. You've touched me. Your Grandma and Mom's story touched me. God's love touched me. In such pain, you were given this great gift of being there with them and singing them into Heaven.


  9. Michelle: I lost my Mom when I was 22 (she was 44) and so regret not being THERE when she left us. This is a beautiful thing you did. And painful. And loving. God bless.

  10. Pingback: The Place of Gratitude —
  11. Pingback: the act —
  12. Pingback: Truck Driving Dream —
  13. Pingback: Sifted by Rick Lawrence —

Leave a Comment