*A note before you read this. After doing an audit of my blog in 2022, I have decided to leave content that speaks to the Christian I was at the time this was written. I no longer identify as Christian (and haven’t for a very long time.) I chose to leave these posts because it is who I was then and it is important to me to be honest and true with every iteration and evolution of self that I experience. I may decide to add comments to the end of posts like this as well
My yard is a mess!
We didn’t get to rake and burn all the leaves from fall so there they lie. I decided to take advantage of the nice weather of late. I grabbed the rake and the lighter and decided to work on one section a day.
I got a good pile raked up. And I had a good chat with God. Things have been rough here lately. Rough because I am being called out of my comfort zone. God is asking me to do something that is really hard for me. It is a delicate situation. And of course, one I’ve never been in before.
Typically, in this kind of situation, I’d be expected to defend myself. The people involved expected me to be volatile. Why? Well, they don’t really know me. They think they do. They know I’m a strong woman, so they seem to have assumed that strong also means immature.
God gave me Exodus 14:14: The LORD will fight for you; you must be quiet.
Do you know how HARD it is for ME to be quiet? Uhm…yeah. Especially when people are attacking.
So I’m raking leaves, talking to God about it. And the rake breaks. It is the only
“good” rake we have. I broke one just like it last year, too.
Just like me right now. Made for a purpose, designed for a specific task. But broken.
I go to the garage and get the old steel rake. You know the one. It does not work well for raking a LOT of leaves at once. But I doubt I’ll be able to break that one. And when I stick that one in the fire–it doesn’t melt.
Never did I think raking leaves and breaking my rake would teach me an eternal lesson about God.
That plastic rake I was using to get bunches of leaves in a big ‘ol pile? Well, it is not designed to be in the fire. The fire heats up that plastic and weakens it. And it breaks.
You need a rake for the fire? Gotta get out the big dog. The heavy steel one. The one that’s been in the fire before. The one that was DESIGNED to be in the fire. The one that can withstand the heat. That little ‘ol leaf pile can’t get hot enough to weaken the steel.
I laughed. As I often do when God uses these odd ways of telling me things. I laughed and said, “OK. You got me! I get it!”
Those people attacking? I’m guessing they’ve never had a broken rake. Heck, they may not have ever had to burn leaves before. Maybe they live in a place where there is no fire, so they’ve never had to get out the steel rake?
Some of us live where we’ve got to burn a lot of leaves.
And I’m proof positive that this rake was made to withstand the heat.
He showed me.