Visual Prayer–Tears in God’s Bottle

*A note before you read this. After doing an audit of my blog in 2022, I have decided to leave content that speaks to the Christian I was at the time this was written. I no longer identify as Christian (and haven’t for a very long time.) I chose to leave these posts because it is who I was then and it is important to me to be honest and true with every iteration and evolution of self that I experience. I may decide to add comments to the end of posts like this as well

Rough days are inevitable. Seems like they come in conjunction with some of the biggest blessings. Which I suppose is par for the course.

What makes rough days worse is stupid people. Or stupid mean people. Or just plain ole people.
It might not be that way for you. I walk a tightrope between introvert and extrovert so while some days being with people energizes me, other days, it exhausts me to a disturbing point.

I continually read on of Oswald Chambers’ devotionals about exhaustion. You’re doing yourself a huge disservice if you relate to what I’m saying but don’t read this. It’s short.

I was feeling pressure from so many areas (some of them self-induced) so I decided to take a bath with some lavender bath salts, listen to Jeremy Camp on the iPod dock, and have some quiet time with God. I covered my eyes with a washcloth and asked the Holy Spirit to quiet my soul.

It took awhile. I think my mind naturally resists being still and quiet. The song Letting Go came on and behind my washcloth covered closed eyes, I clearly saw a jar with tears in it.

And I cried.

Then I put on my big girl panties and decided I could trust God to handle these mounting problems of mine. If he could store my tears in a jar, he could certainly take care of some insignificant people that were bothering me. Besides, what they do shouldn’t be my concern, right?

I hurried to my easel and painted a jar.

Then I decided I needed to know where that verse was and in what context it was written. Turns out, it was smack in the middle of a Psalm. Psalm 56.


And what a wonderful Psalm it is for someone in the position I had been complaining about being in.

By creating prayer, renewal washed over me.

My spirit calmed and then soared.

The urge to crawl into bed and hide away from the world for weeks on end was gone.

Restored.

Not alone in misery and wandering, but every tear recorded and kept in God’s bottle.

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10 thoughts on “Visual Prayer–Tears in God’s Bottle”

  1. Powerful image, Michelle. I love the way you used the water, like tears running over the surface of your prayers. Thanks for sharing this.

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  2. The painting is powerful. I can relate in many ways to what you're saying here. I thought about this recently. And thought He must have a pretty big jar for me. But then was encouraged when I ran across Psalm 126:5 shortly thereafter because it says that those who "sow in tears, shall reap with joyful shouting."

    I'm counting on that! Hang in there, my friend. Let me know if you need to chat.

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  3. This is so amazingly amazing! So glad you came to this place. I could feel your exhaustion over the phone.

    Sometimes we are so much alike I can't even believe it!

    Love ya girl!

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  4. This post makes me want to dig out all of my art supplies and set myself up a corner in the basement so i have somewhere to retreat to in times of need. i have found i need more and more of these moments lately, when feeling tugged in a million durections, or overburdened with life in general. i need a release, and art was that for me for a long time….then this family came along and i seemed to lose all that was "me". i need it back, on so many levels.
    You are such a talented artist, i am so blessed to know you, so much more than you could ever believe.

    love you oh so much.

    jen

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  5. I came your blog as if by accident this morning and am touched by both your art and your openess. As an artist I also express prayer through painting. Knowing the extent that God cares for us and doesn't look lightly at our pain is the beginning of healing – Bless you –

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