What happened?

*A note before you read this. After doing an audit of my blog in 2022, I have decided to leave content that speaks to the Christian I was at the time this was written. I no longer identify as Christian (and haven’t for a very long time.) I chose to leave these posts because it is who I was then and it is important to me to be honest and true with every iteration and evolution of self that I experience. I may decide to add comments to the end of posts like this as well

I used to be so creative and artistic.

I don’t know when I stopped or what happened to make it stop.

I need to thank God for a few people in my life. My first soul-mate of a sister, Kimmie. She is SO foo-foo. Something that I have claimed not to be. Kimmie didn’t buy it. I don’t really know what she saw in me, but she knew.

She made it her mission to transform me. What she didn’t know is that she wasn’t really “transforming” me, she was really just uncovering things I thought were worthless. God also knew that it would take a strong, determined woman to uncover those things that were buried and decaying. He has allowed Kimmie to chip away at my false sense of who I am little by little.

I used to wear very brown and black and neutral colors. That was it. Navy, dark green, maroon. Very solemn and gloomy. Kimmie has slowly pushed me (ok, it wasn’t a nice gentle push…but she knows I’m stubborn) to wear some color.

I am proud to say that I wore my lime green shoes on Easter Sunday and didn’t feel one bit uncomfortable! The lime green and pink purse go lovely with the pink pants and cute green top. Oh and today, I wore the brightest orange and pink outfit, complete with matching flaming orange shoes and purse. This is really who I used to be. I lost her somewhere. Thank you Kimmie. Thank you God for giving me Kimmie!

4 thoughts on “What happened?”

  1. The Kimmies are a blessing from God. I know what it’s like to have a Kimmie. I used to feel so worthless, so useless and at times, I still do.
    Praise God for Kimmies.

  2. Go, girl!

    Sometimes the hardest thing to be is who we really are. Just ask me. I’m still wondering.

    I’m proud of you, Kimmie and the King!

  3. you don’t know me, but i saw your blog on a messageboard about Christian books. i started going through people’s blogs and found this entry to be strikingly similar to some of my own laments. over the past couple years i’ve been wondering what happened to some of my own adventuresome nature and creative wanderings. i’m slowly getting back there, but learning along the way. i’ve recently been revisiting my writing roots, starting to do some work for people at church, etc. i just read this book DEADLINE, by randy alcorn, which really challenged me and surprised me. made me think about my activist spirit and how to get back there. anyway, just a little not of encouragement from a fellow woman on the journey of life 🙂 blessings~


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